Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Changing Lanes

Okay, I quit working full time few months ago. I got tired of it. I felt I sacrificed my life - happiness, health, and all to much that I lost myself elsewhere. I had to stop and ask: Where am I leading? Do I really to continue with this? What I really want to do with my life? I am close to being 40 and I know some people who have awakened from long sleep and realized they want to do something else. I will be away from the city for some sort of soul searching. I have some things playing on my mind on what I really want to do and I want to start with myself. I have been big all my life. I grew bigger and now close to 300lbs. I feel depressed. I cannot wear clothes I want. I cannot do activities that I have imagining to do. And I want to get out from this body size. I want to weigh 150 lbs at the end of 2012. I want to make clothes. No, I want to upscale clothes. I want to focus on making crafts I can sell online. I want to work with my hands. I want to start from there. Whew! This decision means that I need to leave my family behind and think only about me, myself, and I. It took me almost 15 years to realize this. Sadly, I am in a different difficult situation now.